The overarching theme for March has been change.
Whenever I sit down to write one of these updates, I always read through the last month’s post to see how much has changed and what might need updating. So much has happened since I hit “schedule to post on February 22nd” last month!
The biggest decision, which doesn’t really fit into any of the categories below, was to retire from massage at the end of this month. Which is now just two days away. I made the decision a few days after my last State of Kate post, and since then it’s been a whirlwind of seeing clients, referring them out to new practitioners, and winding down while having one of my busiest private practice months to date.
While that’s been the biggest thing for me this month, these posts still (thankfully) have a structure, which is a good thing because I’d be all over the place otherwise. Let’s dig in, shall we?
A couple weeks ago, I began running outside again after a long winter of being stuck indoors. It’s been going in fits and starts, because for every nice day, there are three more where the temps barely get above freezing or we have another snowstorm.
After that first run of the season (which included a snow squall, frigid winds, and icy trails), I got home and complained to my husband, “when does it start getting easier?” His response was, “when you start doing it regularly.”
After I stopped throwing stuff at him, I admitted (to myself; never to him. Of course) that he was right. If I wanted to make progress with this running thing, I needed to do it more than once every week and a half. So I have been. And it has been getting easier. A few days ago, I ran 1.71 miles on the treadmill, without stopping for a break. That is a personal best for me, and gives me hope that I’m doing better than I think I am.
I am also discovering that as much as I’m beginning to understand what others see in running, if I stop my streak at any point, picking it back up again will be really hard. Because I don’t like to run. I took two days off after a five day streak and now I’m already struggling to get back out there.
I’m also stoked to report that I managed to get in three Kempo classes this week! It felt great . . . except for that part on Tuesday where I hyperextended my right arm. So now I’m unable to do burpees or push-ups while it heals (darn). Thankfully, nothing broke and I still have good range of motion. I’m just waiting for the swelling and soreness to go down.
LESSON TO LEARN: Finding the ease in the work is key. Sometimes it takes a while. Sometimes you gotta struggle and flounder and bitch and complain before you find it. But once you do? LEVEL UP, my friend. Also, if a Sensei is doing a crescent kick while you hold a hand pad out to the side, bend your arm ahead of time.
March is hard, because the calendar says “Spring” and the weather says “Winter 4EvR!”. As a result, one day I want salads and fruit, and the next day mac n’ cheese. I’m doing my best to maintain lots of fruits and vegetables, but it can be tough.
Just a week ago, I decided to get back on Livestrong. They have a calorie and fitness tracker that you can use to lose weight or maintain. Since I have a difficult time judging how much I need to eat for recovery (or at all, ever), I decided this would be a good way to help me figure that out.
On the plus side, thanks to all the crazy exercising I did this past week, I lost a couple pounds. Frankly, I’m okay with not losing anything (I’m doing this mostly to make sure I’m adequately fueled), but as it’s weight I don’t need, I’m happy with the results.
LESSON TO LEARN: Sometimes the best way forward is to confront your habits and see what serves you and what doesn’t. Sometimes the best way to do it is to shine a big ol’ spotlight on them so they can’t hide.
I’ve been so busy lately that I haven’t had much time to really think about anything too much. Which has been a bit of a relief, frankly. My classes and internship are winding down and I’m scrambling to get all of my final coursework done before heading off on vacation next week. Between that, all of the exercising, and a couple side projects going on—not to mention closing down a business and taking care of my family—I’ve been non-stop this month.
My April is looking busy as well, getting my new business up and running and (hopefully) getting some paying clients. In addition, most of my free time will be spent training or recovering from training, as my brown belt test is just over a month away oh my freaking god what am I thinking don’t thinkaboutdon’thinkaboutitARGH!!!!!
Ahem. Yeah, so . . . I’m keeping myself busy.
LESSON TO LEARN: Working hard is good. Don’t forget to stop every once in a while and simply enjoy what you’ve got.
To say that my emotions are all over the place this month would be an understatement. I’ve been running myself exhausted with seeing as many of my clients as possible and squeezing in as much cardio as I can. Not to mention the schoolwork, internship, and personal projects.
I’m exhausted, I’m excited, I’m happy, I’m scared, I’m sad, I’m wondering what the fuck I was thinking doing all of this.
In other words, the normal human range of emotions.
We’re taking our first real vacation since our honeymoon two years ago next week. Toby is staying with our house/pet sitter. We are going to not think, not work, not do anything but play for five full, sunshiney, warm days. We’re going to push the reset button, and it’s going to be magical.
LESSON TO LEARN: It’s okay to feel your feels. You’re feeling them for a reason.
Looking back on what I’ve written, I would say my final lesson is: Keep on keeping on.
I got this. Yes, it’s a lot. But these are all manageable things that can be accomplished in the grandness of time. I’ve got so much to be grateful for, and so much to look forward to. It’s important to do the work, and it’s also important to take a step back every once in a while and give the work some space. Because that’s where things bloom and grow.